Wednesday, October 28, 2009

ModCloth Sale, Day 2

UPDATE: I got the first dress, the I-Spy Dress. Both my roommate and boyfriend agreed that it was the better dress, the latter saying that the Heart of the Ocean dress is too widow-ish or something. Men. But he had a point. Oh, and I also got a necklace--but I swear my spending spree ends there. I'll do a post next week showcasing everything. *END UPDATE*


I didn't buy anything today, but I did see two gorgeous dresses that I'd like to get:

The I-Spy Dress, originally $80, now $40:

I featured this in the previous post of things I was hoping would be on sale.

And the Heart of the Ocean, also marked down from $80 to $40:



So now I have to decide if one of these dresses is worth $47... Obviously I can only get one. I really like the first one, the I-Spy Dress, for its versatility and pop-art look. The second, the Heart of the Ocean Dress, is much fancier, but so beautiful--and I don't really own any cocktail/wedding dresses. All of my dresses are pretty casual. But that's because I don't go to many fancy events. So it's a tough decision. I'll post tomorrow which one I buy, if I do decide to buy one!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Update: ModCloth Sale Day 1

I bought three items from ModCloth today that were on sale, and here they are:

The Through the Lens Bag, originally $60 but I got it for $12:
I love big bags, and I haven't bought a new bag in years. This bag reminded me of something but I just couldn't put my finger on it... And there was only ONE left, annnd it was marked down from $60 to 12 bucks. So even though it's not my usual style, I got it. Only afterwards did my friend Jill inform me that it's basically a bowling bag. Oh well. I still like it.

Time on My Hands Ring, originally $18, got it for $3.60:
I don't own a lot of rings, in fact, I'm not even sure I have one-- But now I do, and it's awesome. The band is, of course, adjustable so it'll fit any finger size. The "clock" part isn't actually functional but I'm thinking I'll pretend it is and fool everyone.

The Sweet Ice Socks, originally $12 and I got them for $3:


I've wanted these socks for a while, but thought $12 plus the $7 shipping was too much. However, I was more than willing to pay $3 for their crazy cuteness!


All in all, even with shipping, it was around 20 bucks, which isn't bad. I planned on $35, tops. Of course, the sale continues tomorrow and Thursday, so I might be tempted to splurge and buy one more thing if I spot something amazing. We'll see!

Monday, October 26, 2009

Saaaaale!

OMG, OMG, OMG.

Mod-retro-indie-and-vintage-inspired-style lovin', bargain huntin' fashionistas, prepare for battle! Drink lots of fluids! Get a good night's sleep! Because tomorrow, ModCloth is having a huuuuge sale. 50-80% off on their site, starting tomorrow and ending Thursday. I'm so excited (can you tell?). Finally, I'll get a chance to actually buy something beautiful from there--and at a reasonable price! I'm still mad about the $7 shipping, but whatever. I'm not sure how much to hope for; what are the chances of me being able to snag one or more of my favorite pieces at more than half off? I don't know, but I can't wait to find out. I'm sure that by the end of this week, I'll be much poorer, but much happier and more fashionable. And not like, totally destitute, like I would be if I bought things from ModCloth when they weren't on sale. Eek.

Anyway, here's some of my favorite things from the site and their current prices; I'll update this week with whatever prices that get reduced.
First, shoes:

Glass slipper shoes, $43:

I'd feel like Cinderella wearing these. Although I'm not sure where I'd wear them to.

Forsithya shoes, $30:

So so pretty.


D'arcy Boots, $50:


I NEED these.


Chocolate Ganache Flats, $30:

I don't NEED these, but I like 'em.


Bibliophile Heels, $70:

I just really like the name, haha. I'm a self-proclaimed bibliophile. And these shoes are so classy.


Wannabe heels, $38:

I looooove the colors, and they're obviously named after the Spice Girls. Need I say more?


Unicorn Princess Heels in Pewter, $120:

Obviously these are kind of ridiculous, but that's why I want them. They're so outlandishly different, and the name cracks me up. Besides, what girl wouldn't want a UNICORN heel?


The Double Heel-ixs, $43:

These would look great with thick socks or colorful tights.


Her Name is Rio Sandals, $38:

I like these cause they're so gaudy, which is actually something I look for in sandals. I don't like my feet, so I'd rather have people looking at the shoe than my toes.

(Oh, and if anyone's wondering, I'm a size 8 or 9; 8.5 is always a good bet. WINK WINK.)


Now, my top four dresses that I'll be keeping an eye out for:

the Simple Pleasures Dress, $45:


The name says it all: this dress is simple, but gives me great pleasure.


The Goldfinch dress, $65:

I'd probably rename it the Goldfish dress, per my boyfriend's embarrassing nickname for me.


the I Spy Dress, $78:

I dunno why this one is so damn expensive, but I like it, darn it :(


the Forest Dress in Navy, $70:

Also expensive, but very pretty. Reminds me of my grandmother's fancy china. I'd love to wear my oversized white sweater over it.


And finally, some miscellaneous items (which, for me, is anything that doesn't fall under the categories of shoes or dresses):

Field club top, $35:

Not my usual style, but um... I think I'd look cute in it?


Hot Night Owl-t, $35:

I'd love to wear this and try to make my expression match the owl's: the perfect blend of haughtiness and boredom.

Beast Friends Forever Tee in Sleepover, $22:

Hehe, I love this. Soooo adorable, and even though I'm not a pink kinda girl, I'd totally wear this.

Art vs. Music Tee, $33:

Another great t-shirt.


The Little Hat That Could, $24:

Remember how I said a few posts back that I need a hat for this winter? Well, this would be a good one, I think.


I Mean Business Tunic, $43:


So sophisticated.


Reverberation Tights, $30:

You have to see these close-up, they're amazing.

Book Report Vest, $48:

50 bucks for a freakin' vest is a lot, but I really adore this.

Panda Ear Bud-dies, $15:

So. Damn. Cute.


The Adventurist Skirt, $87, NOW $40! (Still too much for me though, damnit.)


I love the front zipper.


The Born to Run Bomber in Asbury Park (whew, what a name), $65:

I'd feel like such a badass wearing this. So different from my usual light blue peacoat.





Alright, so starting tomorrow, I'll be keeping my eye on all these things, and hopefully I'll snag a great deal! And maybe you will too! Good luck!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Top 5 Things I'm Going to Buy With My First Paycheck

Anyone ever see the movie "High Fidelity" with John Cusack? Not as in, went with John Cusack to see the movie; he stars in it. I suppose that's stating the obvious, but whatever. Anyway, in that movie, the main characters love making top 5 lists, mostly about music, but about other things as well. Well, I'm a pretty big list person myself, so I think it's about time for top 5 lists to become a feature on Swallow Light Bulbs. Today's is the top 5 things I'd buy with my first paycheck (I swear I'm going to get a job eventually!). Some are fashion-related, such as clothes and shoes, some are art or home-decoration things, and some are just ridiculous-- but they're all things that I just can't afford without a steady income right now. So here they are:

1. Winter boots: specifically, these:

They're Steven Madden's grey suede Binbolo boots, and I love them, but they're $174. I do need winter boots soon, though, so my cheaper options are:

These are also Steve Madden, but not as expensive. I can probably get something like these for under $50.


And these are ModCloth's D'arcy Boots. I love them to death (look at the amazing buckles!) and although they're just a little above what I can afford right now ($50, plus $7 shipping), they look like they'd be a bit sturdier in bad weather than the (cheaper) Steve Madden boots. Well, except for the killer heel. But damnit, I really want them.

2. Tutu: My roommate mentioned to me last night that her boyfriend's sister is a professional ballerina. If anyone told me that they were a ballerina, I'd probably laugh, but professional ballerina has such a nice ring to it. It sounds.... like the most amazing job ever. So while I was looking up green tights on eBay today (whole 'nother story), the search bar suggested green tutus, and who was I to say no to that? There's something so dreamy about the layers upon layers of soft, feminine colors and flouncy fabrics; and I especially love the bolder, flirty colors like red or apple green. So I ended up spending a solid hour looking at green tutus and turning a similar color myself for envying my roommate's boyfriend's sister and her glamorous, surely fulfilling life of tutus and swans. Or something. Obviously I'm not totally sure what the life of a professional ballerina is like, but I sure can imagine. Mostly I just want to be able to have conversations where people say, "Yeah, I hate my boring desk job. Anyway, what do you do?" and then I can say, with the perfect combination of smug and casual, "Oh, I'm a Professional Ballerina."
Anyway, if I could wear a tutu regularly on my college campus without the risk of getting stoned, here are the top contenders, in many different colors (I gave up on ebay and found all of these through Google Image):

I love the combination of light blue and neon green for this one:



AN ORANGE TUTU! Need I say more? I do, actually: that skirt is gorgeous. Look at the ruffles! I seriously want to sink my teeth into this one, it just looks so.... juicy.


I thought this one was just sweet-- the colors, the striped waistband, and the big pink rose:


This one is orange and pink. Love. It's like a soft, warm cloud of girliness and cotton candy.


Although this one's colors are kind of soft, their combination has a bold result:


Again, the combination of colors (yellow and blue) and fullness of the skirt really get me:


I love love love love LOVE the bright green, polka-dot bow on this one ($30 at tbugdesigns.com, get it before I do!):


This is such a bold, fiery red, and I love the thickness of the skirt that goes with it:

I think this girl is amazing. I found this picture on her blog, The Flying Saucer, and if you want to see more tutu stylings then click on the link. I thought she was wearing a red tutu, but it turns out that she's actually wearing a white tutu under this red dress:
Adorable, no? Here's the actual tutu:

Great outfit.

Also, in case you're wondering, "But where on earth would I wear my extremely impractical tutu?", well, it turns out that there's plenty of activities that include tutu-wearing.
Biking:


Horseback riding:


And even ballet dancing:



So don't give up hope. Even if your normal day-to-day life doesn't include spivots and plies and tip-toeing, or whatever it is that ballerinas do, you can wear a tutu too!

(Sorry, I really didn't mean for this post to turn into a frenzied worship of tutus.)

Also, I would have sooooo much fun here. Makes me wish I was majoring in theatre because if I could, I'd spend my whole life in a costume and makeup room. You can probably tell how excited I am for Halloween.

3. Vagina couch: My roommate and I have decided to bunk our beds so that we'll have more room, and we want to fill that newly-acquired space with a couch. I'm pretty sure that she would frown on a vagina couch, but I just happened to be googling couches and oddly, this was right at the top. I won't post a picture on here, but this is where you can check it out. It's being sold for $600 on Craiglist by the crazy art student that made it. Think it's worth $600 and a drive to Northern California? (And the wrath of my roommate?)

4. Tibetan hand-painted end table: Okay, I guess my home-decor tastes are pretty eclectic. But I saw this on overstock.com and it's just so damn pretty and refined (yeah, the polar opposite of the previous... thing).

Maybe not worth $200 though. Then again, is a couch shaped like a woman's genitals worth three times that? Probably not, no. Okay, maybe a little.

5. Everything on ModCloth: Well, this post took longer than I thought it would and I'm running late, so I think this will do for #5. After all, I love everything on ModCloth, and would be hard-pressed to pick just one thing from there to buy. I'll have to do a ModCloth feature soon of all my favorites. But yeah, for this one, the total will probably come to a couple thousand dollars, but didn't I mention that my future job pays that much, like, per day? That's right, I'm going to be a high-end hooker.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Ugly Find of the Week

This is courtesy of my good friend Jill: the $3 million Fantasy Bra from Victoria's Secret.

I don't know about you guys, but I wouldn't pay $3 million for something that looks like an Oktoberfest-themed torture device.

Fashion Advice from David Sedaris

I love David Sedaris. My boyfriend Josh gave me a copy of his latest book, "When You Are Engulfed in Flames," (get it for $2.56 from Half.com--it's an order!) and it's one of the few books I've read in recent years that actually managed to make me laugh out loud. There's one passage in particular from the essay "Keeping Up" that I just love because 1. it's hilarious, and 2. it pretty much describes me:

"If I lived alone and something broke, I'd just work around it: use a paint bucket instead of a toilet, buy an ice chest and turn the dead refrigerator into an armoire. Call a repairman? Never. Do it myself? That'll be the day.
I've been around for nearly half a century, yet still I'm afraid of everything and everyone. A child sits beside me on a plane and I make conversation, thinking how stupid I must sound. The downstairs neighbors invite me to a party and, after claiming that I have a previous engagement, I spend the entire evening confined to my bed, afraid to walk around because they might hear my footsteps. I do not know how to turn up the heat, send an email, call the answering machine for my messages, or do anything remotely creative with a chicken. Hugh takes care of all that, and when he's out of town I eat like a wild animal, the meat still pink, with hair or feathers clinging to it."

Okay, so I've only been around for a quarter of a century, and I'm proud to say that I do in fact know how to send an email. But um, yeah, that's about it. Everything else that he confessed to, I'm the exact same way. Thrilled, I told Josh about my discovery. The following discussion resulted:

Him: "So, you're a middle aged gay man at heart?"
Me: "It seems so."
*A pause*
Him: "Does that mean you like men now?"
Me: "Hm. I guess it does. I hope you're okay with that."
*Another pause*
Him: "We'll work through it."

And that is why I love him. But, back to the other guy I love, there's another part in Sedaris' book that I thought would make for some great fashion advice for guys-- and even women, sort of. In the essay "Buddy, Can You Spare a Tie?" he compiles a list of his "more glaring mistakes" into five lessons that we should all keep in mind whenever we're tempted to buy something idiotic. I can't put the entire essay in here, so instead I'm just going to share the title of each lesson and my own little paraphrased summary.

  1. "Guys Look Like Asses in Euro-style Glasses": The title kind of says it all for this one. You know those glasses that are barely larger than your eyes, with dark plastic frames? The kind that might make you "[spend] a great deal of time in front of the mirror, pretending to share intelligent comments regarding the state of Europe"? Yeah, well, as David Sedaris had to learn the hard way, those kind of glasses belong solely on the face of Mrs. Beasley.
  2. "Better the Glasses Than Sweaty Fake Asses": Okay, I'm not sure how many people this one will actually apply to, but maybe this happens more often than I'd suspect. After all, there are a lot of people out there, David Sedaris included, who secretly yearn for the shapely, filled-out backsides they've always lacked. Fortunately, there's a product out there for people with such a problem: an artificial, padded butt! Unfortunately, Sedaris' prosthetic ass somehow managed to turn his real one into "a rusted coin slot," and he ended up giving it away. So proceed at your own risk, brave readers. And actually, I think there's a lesson here that everyone can take away: you don't want to rely on prosthetics your whole life, do you? Just rock what you have! Marylin Monroe and I were both unfortunate enough to be born with a glaringly obvious mole right by our mouths, and she at least turned it into something iconic. I'm currently working on accomplishing the same thing with my ridiculously bony Irish knees.
  3. "The Feminine Mistake": This one kind of just applies to the men. Sedaris had the problem of being small enough at one point in his life that nothing in the men's department fit him, so thanks to his sister he somehow ended up in the women's department. After suffering embarrassment from being the guy wearing pants that zipper up in the back and jackets with shoulder pads and labels like "Sassy Sport," Sedaris eventually realized his horrible mistake and moved on to the boy's department instead. A good call. Women can get away with dressing from the opposite gender's clothing rack, particularly with all the menswear-inspired trends right now, but I'm afraid we haven't come far enough for men to do the same yet. (Although, um, if that's your thing, that's cool. I'm not here to judge!)
  4. "With a Pal Like This, Who Needs Enemies": Now, for women, there's always the option of using accessories to liven up an otherwise drab outfit. But for men, the choices are limited to ties, suspenders, and cuff links. In his search for something "discreet, masculine, and practical," Sedaris discovered Stadium Pal, which is basically "an external catheter... being marketed to sports fans, truck drivers, and anyone else who's tired of searching for a bathroom." Ew. But hey, it met all of his requirements for an accessory. So he tried it out, but eventually decided to forego the whole hospital-pee-bag-attached-to-the-calf thing for a new watchband instead. Again, good call, Mr. Sedaris. As for guys out there that are still searching for the perfect accessory, here are some ideas: sunglasses are good for all seasons (consider the glare of snow on a sunny winter day) and personally, I think the right pair of aviators looks really hot on a guy; a manly messenger bag, like this one (or something cheaper) is extremely practical; leather gloves are stylish and practical; and guys can wear cashmere scarves too (merino wool is a cheaper--and just as soft--option).
  5. "Never Listen to [Your] Father": I'm pretty sure that everyone's father has given them poor fashion advice at one point in time. Sedaris' father convinced him to wear a bow tie. As Sedaris says, a bow tie can go well with a tux. My then-boyfriend wore a bow tie to my prom, and he was the only one there not wearing a regular tie. He managed to look very James Bond, as well as fashionable and original. However, with just a regular suit, or anything else, a bow tie says a certain thing about you. Sedaris finally finds out what that is: "'A bow tie announces to the world that you can no longer get an erection.'" Ouch. Maybe keep that in mind, boys. Except, of course, for the occasions when you're wearing a tuxedo and are going for the James Bond look (which, in my opinion, never fails). And think twice before you follow fashion advice from your dad.
That's it for this week's Celebrity Fashion Advice. Coming up next: fashion advice from Zooey Deschanel! (No, I did not manage to achieve my life-long goal of kidnapping the lovely Zooey, but we're going to make do anyway.)

Monday, October 19, 2009

Kelly's Closet: Dresses

Alright, faithful readers. Yes, all.... one or two of you. As I promised in the last "Kelly's Closet," I'm going to share with you my collection of dresses. I really do consider it to be a sort of collection. There's nothing I love more than a pretty dress, especially now that I have a very boy-ish haircut and have taken to walking around campus in jeans and my boyfriend's oversized college hoodie. Whenever I feel like I'm losing every last shred of my feminity, I race to my closet and pull out a fun, flirty dress--and often pair it with a lot of additional clothing, now that it's gotten so cold out. I didn't pair the dresses with anything for this post, though, since that would have taken forever. Also, I apologize in advance for shitty picture quality and the lame backdrop that is my roommate's side of the room (not that her side is lame, it's totally not. I just-- Ah, you know what I mean.) Improvements coming soon!


So, for the first of my HUGE collection of dresses (okay, I have eleven; is that a lot, or no? Leave the number of dresses you own in the comments!), I'm starting things off with one of my favorites:


My mom bought me this dress in Bethlehem at the annual Musikfest there. It's just so damn pretty. Whenever I wear it, I feel like dancing through a flowery meadow barefoot with hippie music playing in the background. I love wearing it in the fall with brown leggings and a warm cardigan.

This dress I got from K-mart or WalMart or something like that for 6 bucks:
My boyfriend's opinion is that anything with black and white stripes either makes you look like you just escaped from prison, or like Beetlejuice. But I don't care, even though I sort of agree; I love the pockets and the 3/4 sleeves and the pleats and the way it hugs the barely-there curves of my body. I like to pair it with a blue vest or colorful tights and a cardigan to break up the jailbreak theme a bit.

This is a Wet Seal "dress" that I got off eBay for about $15:
As you can see, it's a bit too small to be worn by itself as a dress. It has to be paired with something to cover the rest of me up (unless I'm wearing it over my bathing suit to the beach, which it's great for). Anything from leggings to a baggy cardigan helps, and it's easy to mix and match things with it because it's got red, yellow, black, and green. I also love the little heart pockets, though you can't see them too great in this picture.

This I found at Goodwill for less than a dollar:
It was so cheap because it has a large rip in the back, but it's definitely wearable. It's a very clean rip, and I fixed it up so that it looks like an intentional open back. I either put something under it or wear it as it is, depending on the weather and occasion. I adore the double-breasted buttons and slightly puffy sleeves.

I forget where I got this from (possibly Kohl's?):
Who doesn't love stripes? I also love the wide waistband. The neckline does have a rather daunting drop, though, so I pretty much always wear something under it, be it a camisole or a long-sleeved shirt.

This I definitely got from Kohl's, I forget for how much, and it's a size L or XL:
Although it's much too big on me (the neckline usually ends up drooping somewhere near my waist), I love the colorful design and, again, pockets. I often wear a bright orange or blue tank top under it.

This dress was a gift, so its origin and price will have to remain a mystery:
It's a lovely, flowy material (that also tends to cling a bit, so I have to watch out for pantylines and such), and the color is so much nicer in person than in the picture. Here's a closeup of the detail on the straps (they're covered in tiny bronze and gold plates):
To me, that small detail makes the dress.

This dress I found in a little shop in my old college's town; a group of friends insisted I buy it, and it was around $30:
So far, I haven't figured out an appropriate time to wear it. When I bought it, I pictured myself wearing it while having a Victorian tea with Oscar Wilde, the two of us sitting daintily amongst the May lilacs. Um, that hasn't happened yet. I'm scared to wear it because it's so white and so... I don't know. Wedding-ish? Hey! There's something I could wear it to. In like 10 or 15 years...

This dress was a gift from my amazing friend, Jill:
It's easy to dress up or down. I wear it with a cardigan and tights (and of course, my trusty vintage lace-up chunky booties!) to class , and with red heels to fancy thingamajigs.

This is ModCloth's Stormy Weather Dress, and I found it for a bit cheaper on eBay (around $15):
It's a frustrating dress, through no fault of ModCloth's. It's a size small, so the tight waistband tends to squeeze my kidneys rather painfully if I wear it for too long, and gives me a caricature version of an hourglass figure (making me look kind of pregnant). On the plus side, as my boyfriend likes to point out, it makes my boobs look big. Cheers to that. Anyway, I usually wear it over or under something: an oversized sweater, a tight black T-shirt, black tights, etc.

This is from the same store where I purchased the white dress above, and was about $30 or $40:
It's actually meant to be worn as a skirt, the kind that touches the floor. That's not my style at all, so I wear it as a dress. The elastic band at the top makes it perfect for this. In this instance, I paired it with a silver belt that my mother handed down to me. Sometimes I pair it with a black belt, but I always have something cinching it to give it some form.

It's so pretty I had to include a second picture, this time of the back, while I'm swirling like a crazy fool (I often do that when wearing dresses):



And there you have it! The eleven dresses that I have in my closet. I still want more, too; it's an insatiable hunger for me. It's gotten bad enough that whenever that Cotton commercial comes on, I want to kidnap Zooey Deschanel and force her to hand over all her pretty dresses. Actually, here's a better idea: maybe I'll have a feature on the lovely Zooey and her awesome fashion sense. We'll see!
Oh, and next from Kelly's Closet will be bags. You know, purses, handbags, totes, whatever. I don't have as many of those as dresses, but it's either that or underwear, folks.